Training set for couples interested in serving

as 'marriage coaches'

     VANCOUVER, Wash. — “Thanks to you, the word divorce is no longer mentioned in our lives.”
    According to Al and Autumn Ray, founders of Vancouver-based MarriageTeam, such comments could soon be received by couples who are willing to serve as “marriage coaches.”
    Marriage coaching is getting a big boost in the Northwest with the expansion of MarriageTeam, a new non-profit that is expanding its low-cost coaching services in the Portland-Vancouver area to include Longview, Wash.
    Married couples desiring coaching simply request a coach couple from MarriageTeam and are matched with an available couple for eight to 12 two-hour weekly sessions. Coaching is also available for premarital couples, and follows a six-week curriculum.
    Coaching normally occurs in the coaches’ home, and the results so far have been amazing, according to the Rays. Couples were surveyed about their coaching experience and rated it a 9.2 on a scale of 1 to 10. When asked how their relationship was prior to coaching, the average on the same scale was 4.3. Asked what it was following coaching, couples rated it an average 7.2 — a 67 percent improvement.
    Why are coach couples so effective? The Rays explain that coaches are trained to listen well and ensure that the couple being assisted really understands one another. The coaches then guide the couple through a problem-solving process by asking questions that help couples find their own solutions.
   “The beauty of coaching is that the couples develop their own solutions and the coaches simply provide the incentive for following through by asking them the next week how their solutions worked,” said Autumn Ray.
    Incorporated in March 2006 with seven coaches, MarriageTeam now operates with 17 coach couples and has scheduled fall training for late September and early October in Vancouver and for late October in Longview. The long-term goal is to have marriage coaches nationwide. Training is 26 hours and involves completing the structured couple exercises and practicing the coaching skills.
   “The training hit on every important topic and provided extremely helpful tools,” said Pastor Tom Schiave, who took the coach training with his wife, Kathy. “It’s the best material I have been exposed to. Better than the classes I have taken in seminary and Bible school.”
    The Rays say that to be a marriage coach requires a desire to help other couples and families; a good marriage — not a great or perfect marriage — and a willingness to use faith-based materials and share personal experiences as appropriate. For details, phone 360-450-6042 or go to www.marriageteam.org.